Path to bliss: Attack THAT thing.

BONZAI! (Japanese translation "Let's go CRAZY!")

I want to you attack something.

Yes, I am usually a “go with the metaphysical” flow kind of gal, but this time. This one little time. I want to you to kick some serious ass.

It is the road to bliss. Your bliss. Not mine (unless you tell me, and  please do, on the comment section.)

Not just anything or anyone that happens to pop their head in your office/cubical/kitchen/front door or evil lair. I want you to attack something specific.

Look around. Find it. You know what I’m talking about THAT thing. The one that thing you look at every fucking day with dread, embarrassment. The one you… sigh… will get around to when you have a moment.

THAT thing.

Get up. Go over and deal with it. Deal with it like a crazy person. It either gets filed, fired, thrown out, sent, delivered (NOW!) to the neighbor who passive-aggressively “ignores” you ’cause you been so lax in returning their stupid report/bundt pan/folding table/calculator/weed-whacker. (I love the word “weed-whacker,” just so you know.)

Snap on the crazed “oh lawdy… they’re gonna blow” look of determination and just deal with the mother-effin thing. You’re going to be shocked how easy it was to get done. And how freakin’ happy and … even BLISSful you’re going to be once it is done.

Accomplishment. Whew. Satisfaction with job well done.

Bliss.

(Repeat process tomorrow.)

The Busy Persons Guide to Having it ALL….

Oprah: the definition of "having it all" (w/o kids)

I am overwhelmed.

You?

Mom, Wife, Start-up maven, Blogger, Foodie-on-Parole, Fashionista-ish, Executive Assistant & Social Dir. for Chatty Twins, a Charismatic Two year Old, and an Adopted Mommy to an Aggressively Affectionate Golden Retriever.

Me? Yes, I am.

The problem is I WANT it all: the doting mom, Wonderful Wife, Organic & locally-sourced Recreational Chef, Execu-babe, Athlete, Style and Design Aficionado, to name a choice few; and I WANT to do it all RIGHT. Not half-assed, not “just in time” but thoughtful, consistent and on point every time.

Well I can. Have it all. And I’m not insane.

Here’s the secret: You can have it all, just not all at the SAME TIME.

Seriously. And seriously lame. But the truth hurts.

One of my chicas, Cat, came up with the theory — you can have it all, just at different times in your life. She’s doctor that probably would be practicing emergency room medicine (she loves the high) but works part-time at a bucolic (that be rural folks) hospital in CT so she can be there for her children and husband. She eeks out time for the familuy, lives near some of the best ice cream in the world (cows out back,) but isn’t knee deep in the gun-shot wounds, punctured lungs and flatlines that make her swoon for all the right reasons. Nor is she taking the gourmet cooking classes or traveling to Skye with her fabulous travel compadre BETSY.

Now if you were a person of simple tastes, congrats you probably do have it all.

So, depending upon what you want out of life- you have to pick and choose your roles and hobbies. For example : young children and major careers, designer clothes, intricate Martha Stewart style dinner parties, and white carpeting just, I repeat, just do not mix. In fact it’s toxic. I can guaranteed from personal experience the express train to an overwhelmed freak-out.

So once I thought about scheduling “me” into slots into my life , rather than slots of time during the week I relaxed. So I deal. I’m a foodie-0n-parole. So my house will be fabulously decorated after my kids learn to use a napkin & stop ricocheting off the furniture. Scuba will be after the last child learns to swim and the nanny can travel. My career will be close to home and with flexible hours and limited travel so I can be there for most of my babies boo-boos, beach outings, girl scouts meetings, story hours, and movie nights.

As the babes get older (and as I do) I’ll add more, do more. Do less of others.

Look I am the first to admit I want it all, now. Patience is not an inherent virtue of mine. Though I am trying to learn. But with patience I can have the time to give all of me, all the facets of me, my due. I have to think of the present, what I can accomplish now. And that means prioritizing.

As I said the truth hurts, Priorities suck.

But they are just that… priorities.

And because it struck me as particularly perfect, a little Queen & Bowie:

Mudslide-O-Rama

I am stuck at the National Hotel in Block Island. Massive thunder and lightening show, drinking Mudslides.

Yeah, it doesn’t suck.

Have you ever found yourself stuck someplace only to have it turn out to be better than any alternative?

So here I am drinking (celebrating my hubby’s birthday) commiserating with all the other stranded mainlanders watching Mother Nature put on one HELL of a show ( the last piece of
Lightening touched down right near us in Old Harbor!) eating peeled shrimp.

I find myself thinking about the past few days in this island, it lives and breathes, for the summer visitor dollar. They’ve had a rough go of it with the past few weeks of rain. My hubby and I have made a game profiling BI businesses, from B&B’s, restuarants to t-shirt establisments. Think of it- high season is just July & August, with perhaps a few weeks either way. “The Block,” thrives on repeat customers, weddings and family cottage rentals. Good marketing and high-quality customer service.

But TheLiquidBetsy is always on the scout for business/marketing/innovation and I’ve seen a few things I’d like to share:

- 2 Oars Taxi: (Note: Oars is a picture but I can’t do that on my iPhone…yet) I witnessed the finest, most simple way to ensure repeat business … honesty. While eating lunch at Three Sisters( lunch place I’d recommend) a 2 Oars taxi pulled up, the driver seeking a family eating lunch there. Why? To return a $10 bill he felt the father had accidentally over-paid. Which he had.

Brillant.

That day, the simple act of a taxi driver driving back over his route to return $10, and ended up making 3 or 4 new customers in the process. Probably more in word of mouth, as Three Sisters was PACKED for lunch- the only thing they do- and after he left about 3 others commented on how great that small act was- and how they planned to recommend them to friends coming soon (incl. TheBetsy here.)

Which do think was better for the taxi driver’s bottom line? $10 or multiple long-term referrals?

- The economics of living on an isle. That is a tough racket.

Short of being independently wealthy (yes, please!) these people are born hustlers, in the finest sense of the word. Sure there is the surly college student doing the half-ass summer job. But see a real islander in action is to know they have about 2 or three gigs, often at the same time, to support living here.

I met a woman who rents her home and cleans houses after deciding to stay here on her 40th birthday. Nice as can be, and no regrets. To quote Donna Summer, “she works hard for her money.” Contact Sullivan Real Estate for great houses and rentals.

Often we see shopkeepers DJ’ing at The Yellow Kittens (a good place to lose a few brain cells while listen to live music and where my hubby’s 97 year-old grandmother played hooky with his grandfather back when they were courtin’.) Also the manager of the Sea Breeze, where we stayed & highly, highly recommend for a relaxed, lovely B&B experience, was saying she works at the grocery store during the winter. “You got to be willing to do anything and work hard.” And for the hard-core islander that’s “the truth, Ruth!”

So, finally, the rain & thunder & lightening have subsided a bit, though the mudslide still is a kickin’. I say good- bye to one of my favorite (check “Betsy’s Top 50) places in the World.

Cheers.

Note: I posted this on the iPhone using the WordPress iPhone app… in the middle of Block Island Sound, with links. That’s impressive. The technology out today is just so innovative. Am in awe.

I am totally deadly now.

Taking it to the streets

TheBetsy is on the loose.

You heard me. Loose. Running free.

Which is awesome considering I’ve just spent 2 1/2 weeks home-bound with children and NON-STOP rain.

Lesser people would’ve broken. I broke about 4 days ago. A lot is said about motherhood- suffice to say I can tell you from experience your Mom is right: you ARE ungrateful, you SHOULD feel guilty. Not only did you ruin her body, but she probably was cool before she had you.

Look, if being a Mama was just a regular job, I can speak with utmost confidence, we all would have quit. A while ago.

So back to being on the loose.

I’m spending a few delicious days child-free with the hubby- the benefits of having fabulous in-laws who are absolute bonkers over their grandchildren.

Lucky, lucky girl.

So whilst I’m traipsing around the countryside I’m trying a little experiment- total iPhone blogging. No computers all must be done with “Velma,” my trusty side-kick of an iPhone 3G. (No “S” model- I don’t really need it, though the hubby is working on me, so we’ll see.)

Stay tuned readers of TheLiquidBetsy…

Meet the Greatest ROI Shirt- The NEW #44 of The Betsy’s top 50 Faves

High ROI shirt- No Iron Pinpoint Shirt

I’ve got style.

I also have kids. And am cheap.

When I find something that is in the intersection of these three things I have to share. It’s compulsory. And this one has made The Betsy’s top 50, (see #44, )

First a confession.

My mom, Jeannine, is known as a sage among my oldest friends (which, of course, now you can see the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.) She has a few rules that just keep coming back to haunt me. And my friends.

A few gems from Jeannine:

1. If it doesn’t add tingle to your life, GET IT OUT.

2. If you know you’re going to hate yourself for not buying it, no matter what… buy it. If you love it, buy one or two more (especially for shoes, especially if you’re a size 8 1/2 or up.)

3. All will be revealed, in due time. (This is actually from  Mabel, mother of Jeannine and Grandmother of The Betsy- works like a charm for gossip and office intrigue. Basically have patience.)

Of course Jeannine, being my mother, I am skeptical of any and all clothing gifts. Her style is sometimes not my own, and other times she is spot on. Go figure.  But it’s the thought that counts, and I am one to always try new things (go see #29) so when I received the following for Christmas I gave it the old college try.

Boy am I glad I did. Jeannine strikes again.

She gave me two classic button-up shirts- from Land’s End.  You heard me right. Land’s End.

Meet Land’s End No Iron Pinpoint Cotton Shirt. And it’s on sale.

Hello-oooo Gorgeous.

For a busy, stylish Mom (or college student, or young professional) these wonderful shirts are just fabulous. No iron (so no iron or dry cleaners) they look much more costly than they are. They are the ultimate High ROI shirt. They wash like a dream and they are classically stylish. I top mine with one of my big chunky necklaces and tuck up the collar, sometimes pairing it with a fab belt, dark-rinse sexy jeans or classic pencil skirt and a vintage Hermes scarf. Pure fashion YUM. Think like Diana Vreeland,  Katherine Hepburn and Coco Chanel chic. All, who while epitomes of style, were the first purveyors of high-low fashion mix. Tres, tres chic.

If you want the best bang for the buck. Great casual shirt or just a great shirt. Buy one of these shirts (hell, at these prices buy two or three.) They pack wonderfully and take a beating. Believe me I know what I talk of. As soon as the twins were born I shelved all my silk. Spit-up is like kryptonite to silk. A killer.  These Land’s End No Iron Pinpoint Shirts seem to be impervious to sticky finger and gooey, snotty hugs & kisses, catsup and chocolate pudding.

Did I mention they’re on sale? Like $19 bucks.

Again, Hello-oooo Gorgeous.

Note: I am totally not being sponsored by Land’s End, though I prolly should be. This Rec fits TheLiquidBetsy’s “if it’s good, it’s good” motto.

Motivation: gets the Respect…still quietly kicks everyone’s ass.

Photo courtesy of h.koppdelaney, from Zen Habits

In my last post, I was giving Motivation it’s due respect. Looks like I’m not the only one! One of my fave’s (see the blog roll if you don’t believe me– it’s on Betsy’s RSS feed) Zen Habits-Simple Productivity has a post on the topic.

It you don’t know Zen Habits you should, with 119,000 RSS subscribers, Zen is considered one of the top blogs around, the creator even has a guided tour (worth the read!)

Contributor Jonathan Meade, Why Motivation Doesn’t Really Matter is actually a misnomer. One of the comments posted said it should be called “Why Trying to Motivate Yourself Doesn’t Work Sometimes” which is a more accurate title. Still worth the read. Read the comments on others take on motivation.  The take-away: motivation deserves respect, mostly because motivation (or lack thereof) still quietly kicks everyone’s ass.

Now on a personal note,  seeing something like this is nice because it means that TheLiquidBetsy is in really, really good company.

So, at least for today, Betsy ate lunch with the cool kids.

If Luck be a Lady, Motivation is Her Snarky, Fugly Sister Melvine.

ABC's Ugly Betty- my patron saint of motivation

We all like luck.

From “Get Lucky” to “Lucky You!,” we cheer each other’s drinks with “Luck be with you.” We throw salt over our shoulder, wear green on St. Paddy’s Day (& kiss the Blarney Stone & hunt for those pesky four-leaf clovers,) for what? For Luck.

But no one ever pays scant attention to Motivation.

Luck is the Prom Queen, and Motivation is her too smart, snarky sister who can’t skate by on her looks and has to work freakin’ hard just to get noticed.

Except nothing worthwhile happens without motivation. Nothing.

Lucky doesn’t get you across any finish line, motivation does. Day in and day out. Think of marathon runners- mostly because I intensely dislike running and thus have utmost respect for any person runs long-distance- and luck, my friend, has nothing to do with it.

Training, lots of training. Running in cold, rain, sleet and snow, heat, early morning before work, late at night, when sick and tired. Running. Not to the corner store— like 10 to 15 miles. Every day. Weekends. Birthdays.

So unless something takes out all the Ethiopians, Kenyans, and the myriad of other born & bred long-distance runners then that bitch Luck has nothing to do with winning the Boston Marathon, let alone finishing it.

I tried to look up the patron saint of motivation. Nada. Again, if Luck be a Lady, Motivation is her Snarky, Fugly Sister Melvine. No respect for the hardest working muse out there.

Oh, except Motivation isn’t technically a muse either.

And just because I can’t help myself (and you know you want it)- a little ditty by the Chairman:

Bite Me Dunkin Donuts. You’re the 70′s Detroit of Doughnuts.

This in response to my Twitter tirade on Dunkin’ Donuts – I promised to expand my 140 character posts into sometime more readable. So, as promised,  here ya go.

A week or so ago was National Doughnut Day.

I love doughnuts. Not on par with cupcakes, or Nutella, or Burn Notice (on USA Network…) but a good doughnut and an ice-cold glass of full-fat milk can be a heavenly experience. Problem is, I live in the North East of the U.S.A. which is pretty much Dunkin’ Donuts territory. So back to my story…

Most places offered a free doughnut for the day (with some sort of purchase, natch) and Dunkin was no different. So being the thrifty (e.g. cheap) Scottish lassie I am, I made a detour with Baby Lug in tow for our free doughnuts. Wondering why in the heck have I not had a doughnut in a while… I mean I love ‘em, right?

Wonder no longer. Dunkin’ Donuts’ offering is embarrassing.

Now my young son loves Dunkin’- but he’s two. He doesn’t know any better. But at Dunkin’– they should. Call me “a marketing person who happens to be a foodie” but if you have it in your name (even if it’s misspelled) the product should be good.  My husband argues that no one goes to Dunkin’ Donut for the doughnuts, they go for the coffee. Silly rabbit Betsy.

It should matter.

Look I don’t expect much in a pastry from Starbucks Coffee or a salad from McDonalds (though they’re not bad in a pinch.) But crap doughnuts from a donut purveyor? That’s just sad. Or worse, it’s just complacency on the part of Dunkin’ Donuts and THAT’S unforgivable. It’s like Detroit of the 70′s– just because you’re the only game in town doesn’t mean you can slack off. Not in this economy. Not ever.

What also irks me is how Dunkin’ takes over a territory. It’s very similar to Walmart- they move into a town and wipe out the local Mom & Pop doughnut shops with convenience and consistently decent coffee. But what they lack is a good doughnut.

They seem to want to offer good food. They hired the ever perky Rachel Ray. Their menu boasts breakfast items, flatbreads, etc. Though I don’t know anyone how has ever really eaten one and enjoyed it. I tried to look at their site to find out more about their menu development and doughnuts… and found nada outside nutritional info. Not even the executive chef that run’s their kitchen. Tons of ways to order coffee though!

What I do know is they are mass produced at the lowest possible price point. Not in small batches, not a whole lot of variety outside of differing kinds cake, and variations of glaze and the god-almighty playdate staple … The muchkin. No bearclaws, no old fashion, no coconut.

Oh and the quality of their cake and glazed? The former has too much nutmeg, the latter is just meh, innocuous and nothing special. Too puffy and always tastes slightly stale. What Dunkin DOES do is make the most of these two basic recipes by using them as the base for most of the rest of their doughnuts. Sure the y have Boston Creme and that doesn’t make variety. And they always have that “just trucked-in taste.”

I think I spent most of my tweets trying to get Winchell’s to buy Dunkin’. At least with Winchell’s you get more variety out of a franchised doughnut. But the best of all is the little doughnut stores that dot the beaches, Main Streets, and corner stores of our great nation. Made early and fresh by people who actually own them.

Perhaps this is the next trend in food? Gourmet doughnuts. Now that is something I’d pay more than full price for!

Move over Magnolia Bakery… the era of the designer doughnut may just be here…

And lest you forget what is was all about Dunkin’, here’s your own 1983 commercial:

Read The Liquid Betsy, NOW Listen to @TheBetsy on BlogTalk Radio!

I was interviewed recently and thought I’d share the end product. Cause it’s good.

Jon Hansen, host of Blog Radio’s PI Window of Business asked me to join a panel to discuss “Has Blogging Crossed the Threshold of Legitimacy?“ I was happy to accept. What an excellent experience I had!  The panel was outstanding, the discussion was fast and furious, and our host kept the us all on time and on topic. One of the best interviews I’ve ever done or been associated with. We went over the allotted time limit. I could have chatted for a lot longer (but you knew that…)

So many thanks to my fellow panelists: the delightful Dr. Ellen Brandt, Ph.D.,  the winner in the Community Marketing’s Great Blog Off. – congrats to her for this week, she launches her new blog “Baby Boomers – The Angriest Generation”; the insightful Elizabeth Hannan, an on-line evangelist at Pragmatic Marketing whose firm focuses on leveraging the new media to elevate brand awareness; and David Bush, who as CEO of Iasta (a supply chain software company) launched probably one of the first “content marketing” blogs as the creator and editor of an industry leading blog the e-Sourcing Forum.

So here is the interview in it’s entirety for your listening enjoyment.

Do the Hustle and Thrive…