Fat-Ass Jeans- Think of it As Another Business Benchmark

These Could be My Fat-Ass Jeans

(Warning: this is about 10% business, the rest is self-indulgent.)

I’m wearing my Fat-Ass jeans. Again.

I think I’m on week 3. Week 2 of “The Diet” (enough said.) I can’t fit into anything else. Refuse to buy a bigger size. I am the walking fashion damned.

All women have them. These Fat-Ass Jeans. I think the male version is the elasticized  shorts or sweats. They’re the Maginot Line for your weight. The last line. The final stand. They are the warning of unacceptable hugeness on the horizon, and with Summer Bikini Season it’s time for action.

Oh, and God forbid we can’t fit in the Fat-Ass Jeans (for brevity will herein be known as F.A. Jeans.) Def-Con 5, Red Alert People. Desperate measures will have to be taken.

So chatting with my friend Suzy about my F.A. Jeans, (Day 27 of wearing them, I have two pairs I interchange so I am at least… clean) I found an amusing parallel between my predicament and business.

No, really. This is what I think about.

We all have limits. In business there are endless ways to quantify our position, cash-flow, balance sheet. Same goes for personal vanity. The F.A. Jeans is my personal limit (I could have it be BMI, weight, how much fast I can run a mile, but the F.A. Jean it is) just as ROI, P/E, Debt/Asset, EBITDA is to business. Unacceptably high (or low) and you’re in the Fat-Ass Jeans. Time to re-evaluate, re-commit, re-engineer, reorganize and get back on track to profitability and your skinny jeans.

How did I find myself in the F.A. Jeans? Not paying attention. Just as in business, an attitude of “Just this time” or “One time Only” and not paying mind to the game at hand. It is a slippery slope into the land of delusion and being in the red (F.A. Jeans.)

So, like with rehabbing a business I am rehabbing myself- one day at a time. Watching my cash-flow, In-flow and expenditures (boot camp helps at bit.) Lately I’ve been having a glass of wine and not running, time to re-commit again.

Think I’ll write a blog post about it.

.

.

(And HUGE credit goes to Rochelle Karina for the photo above, and for being my butt-double. She has more cajones than yours truly. You can see the original posted HERE at Rochelle’s blog .)

6 Responses to “Fat-Ass Jeans- Think of it As Another Business Benchmark”

1. Becki says:

   May 28, 2009 at 1:19 PM

   Love this post, and so true!
2. akcg says:

   June 1, 2009 at 1:43 PM

   Great post. My favorite part is the photo caption — these “could be” my F.A. Jeans, alerting the reader that this particular fat ass is not, indeed, yours. Love it.
3. Patience isn’t only a virtue, it is a differentiator - The Liquid Betsy says:

   June 3, 2009 at 9:28 AM

   [...] probably weren’t a whole lot of F.A. Jeans hanging on people’s [...]
4. christy says:

   June 12, 2009 at 2:34 PM

   I threw out my fat pants (not jeans – I hate jeans because I’m too fat for the cute ones) about a month ago and man there are days when I miss them. But overall I’m so glad I got rid of them…and I’m just at the end of my fourth week of seriously working out and I actually miss it on my off days.
5. Detox Day 20 (JD:6) High Heels & Single Tasking - The Liquid Betsy says:

   February 15, 2010 at 9:48 PM

   [...] No chills, so maybe that’s, as they say here in Boston, OH-VAH! Had to throw out the F.A. jeans. Yes, THE F.A. jeans. I’d burn them only me, matches and lighter fluid might not be a bright [...]
6. Roxy says:

   April 30, 2010 at 3:58 PM

   Thanks! You’re a doll!